I come bearing sad news this morning I’m afraid, as our much-loved pet rabbit Brucie has joined the ranks in bunny heaven since I was in last. I can hardly believe that just a few months ago I was sat here talking to you about this new bun of ours – and that what should’ve been the start of a decade together has been cut so short. But what can I say, London foxes are a real menace.
Losing a pet is such a painful heart opener isn’t it? It’s been a mini crash course in loss for both our kids and, in their own way, they’ve worked through the grief cycle. Denial first, “he can’t be gone” was muttered lots early on, followed by a thorough enquiry into neighbours’ back gardens, then anger – harsh words have been fired at the culpable fox and all his kind, some real sadness (our bedtime regime now has an ‘I miss Brucie’ segment sandwiched neatly between teeth brushing and a story), with some acceptance slowly emerging.
When Bruce died, my daughter Rory stood looking out at his hutch and asked, quite sternly, “why does God even make foxes when people need pet bunnies?” Voicing that age old conundrum of why bad things happen in a world she believes has love at the heart of it.
I contemplated, for a microsecond, streamlining St Augustine’s response to this dilemma – his wonderful, bright idea that evil is the absence of good, in the same way that darkness is the absence of light. It doesn’t exist in and of itself – but rather is where the good stuff isn’t. But instead went for the less philosophical, more anatomical explanation offered-up by the handy old food chain, and foxes and rabbits respective places on it.
As with any loss, we console ourselves with the cherished memories; there’s a photo of him up on the fridge, we’ve held onto his little leash and the Santa hat we had knitted for him at Christmas – we used the name sign that used to be on his hutch to do our own little goodbye ceremony, sharing our favourite moments of him and his precious cottontail.
More recently a campaign for a (fox-resistant) puppy has materialised – its yet to receive an official response from either me or my husband Oscar!